In this article, we’ll dive deep into 5 types of narcissistic parents. Using this knowledge, it could be possible to develop strategies to ease the impact of narcissistic behavior on the affected children.
1. The Immortalizers
Under the first category are the 'Immortalizers'. These types of narcissistic parents view their children as extensions of themselves that will carry on their legacy. Their primary focus is to project their unfinished dreams and unmet goals upon their children, often against the children's preferences or wishes. They view their kids as simply a living medium to achieve any personal aspirations, completely disregarding the child’s own unique interests and ambitions.
2. The Engulfers
Next, we have the 'Engulfers'. These parents become overly involved and intrusive in their child's life to the point where personal boundaries blur. They typically dominate their child's life, dictating their likes and dislikes, and often take credit for their child's achievements. With these types, they will control their child's every move, interfere in all aspects of their life, and even go so far as to insist that they ‘know’ the child's every thought. The engulfing parents demonstrate a marked lack of respect for their child's individuality, thereby stifling their growth and development.
3. The Exploiters
The 'Exploiters' manipulatively use their children to fulfill their narcissistic desires. Compared to the Immortalizers, Exploiter parents do not simply stop at making their children carry on their legacy, but they must also manipulate every aspect of their [public] lives: be it for attention, affirmation, or admiration. These parents' egos always supersede the child's emotional needs. They habitually take advantage of their power as a parent, creating an atmosphere where a child feels valued only for conforming to the parent’s needs.
4. The Emotionally Negligent
Also known as the ignorers, these parents show a constant disregard for their child's emotional needs and show little interest in their feelings or experiences. They tend to belittle their child’s emotions, trivializing their suffering or worries as unimportant compared to their own. Though the basics are provided, it is oftentimes done very begrudgingly. Finally, they are often found to reject their child’s need for affection, thereby leading to a lack of emotional security in the child.
5. The Performance-Driven
Lastly, there are the 'Performance Driven' Narcissistic Parents. These parents mainly value their children based on their achievements. Their love and acknowledgment are conditional on the success and accomplishments of the child. Constant need for perfection, coupled with criticism and unmet high expectations, can lead the child to suffer from severe stress, anxiety, and low self-esteem.
Final Thoughts
It is important to realize that the impact of narcissistic parenting is profound and long-lasting. It leads not only to a distortion of self-worth for the child, but it often also results in lasting mental health issues. The awareness and understanding of these five types of narcissistic parents showcases that although one may be aware that their parents are narcissists, their experiences growing up may be a bit different than another person who was also raised by narcissists.
While it's crucial to remember that every individual, including parents, has flaws, it is just as important to acknowledge when these flaws cross the line into harmful behavior that can negatively impact a child's psychological well-being. Identifying narcissistic parents forms the first step towards a long journey of healing and emotional recovery. The knowledge of these types can provide a sense of empowerment to both the children of narcissists, as well as to professionals dedicated to helping them overcome their experiences.
Takeaway Verse:
Philippians 2:3: "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves."